25 years ago, I had my first experience with depression. I had no reference or understanding of what was happening and the smaller northern community I was living in had minimal counselling services. Instead, I tried a number of different medications over the next 7 years. These provided little relief and resulted in a diagnosis of treatment resistant depression.
Shortly after becoming depressed, I realized I needed a better understanding of human psychology if I was going to make sense of what was going on in my own life. This led me to complete a Bachelors of Psychology degree. I was fascinated with what I learned about the human mind and the nature of suffering and realized I would have to further my studies with graduate school if I wanted to apply what I was learning to help others.
Interestingly, it wasn't until I was in graduate school when I saw a counsellor as part of my degree requirements that I started to have a deeper understanding and appreciation of myself, not from an academic perspective, but with compassion and kindness. This really impacted me. I began to have more grace for my shortcomings (perceived or real) as well as to appreciate my strengths and accomplishments. As I was healing psychologically and the depression was lifting, I was also becoming more capable of authentic love and connection with my wife and kids. This led to a deeper, more fulfilling relationship with them, which I continue to be thankful for.