Marriage Counselling
For marriages that feel stuck, strained, or quietly drifting
Couples come to marriage counselling from different places. For some it’s a crisis — an affair discovered, a betrayal, words that can’t be taken back — and the ground is still moving. For others, nothing broke on any particular day: it’s been months, sometimes years, of the same argument wearing a groove, or a quiet drifting that neither of you chose — two people who share a mortgage, a calendar, maybe kids, and less and less of themselves. However you’ve arrived, wanting help with your marriage isn’t an admission that it’s failing. It’s usually the opposite — it means the marriage still matters enough to work on.
Vista Counselling provides marriage counselling in Langley, BC with Dr. Kevin Klassen — a Registered Marriage & Family Therapist with extensive training in couples work who has been counselling couples since 2009 — drawing on Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), Gottman Method, and PACT, in person at our Langley office or online across BC.
Staying married is a commitment. Staying connected is a practice.
When Marriages Get Stuck
Every long relationship accumulates patterns, and some of them calcify. The ones we see most often: the recurring argument that changes topic but never ends; distance that crept in somewhere between careers and kids, until you’re closer to roommates than partners; trust that took a hit — an affair, a discovery, a broken agreement — and the question of whether it can be rebuilt; and the big transitions that redraw a marriage from the outside: a new baby, an empty nest, retirement, illness, loss.
None of these mean the marriage is over. They mean the two of you are caught in something bigger than either of you — a pattern that’s nearly impossible to see from inside it. Seeing it from a new vantage point is the work.
How We Work With Marriages
Marriage counselling at Vista draws on three evidence-based approaches — Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), Gottman Method, and PACT — each described more fully on our couples counselling page. EFT looks underneath the recurring fights to the attachment question driving them — are you there for me? — Gottman Method works on the observable habits of arguing, repairing, and appreciating; and PACT brings in the nervous system — why you shut down or boil over mid-argument. We don’t run couples through a fixed program; we match the approach to the two of you, and adjust as we go.
Who Does the Marriage Work
Dr. Kevin Klassen, PsyD
More than 20,000 clinical hours since 2009. The RMFT designation reflects specific, extensive, supervised training in working with couples and family systems — not all counsellors who see couples have it.
If You’ve Been Married a Long Time
Patterns that are decades deep can feel like personality — this is just how we are. It’s one of the most common reasons long-married couples don’t reach out. But the length of a marriage isn’t a measure of how healthy it is — and it isn’t a limit on how much it can change. However long the patterns have been running, they were learned somewhere along the way, and what was learned can be reworked. The history you share doesn’t necessarily make change harder — it can give you more to build on.
Marriage Counselling FAQs
Is marriage counselling different from couples counselling?
The work is the same — “marriage counselling” and “couples counselling” describe the same evidence-based approaches. We use both terms because both describe who we see: married couples, common-law partners, engaged couples, and long-term partners of every kind.
What does it cost?
Sessions are 50 minutes. The fee is $200 per session. Many extended health plans reimburse Registered Clinical Counsellors — check whether your plan covers RCCs or RMFTs. Full details, including our cancellation policy, are on our FAQ page.
My spouse won’t come. Is there any point coming alone?
Yes. A marriage is a pattern between two people, and changing one side of a pattern changes the pattern. Individual counselling can shift a relationship — and sometimes a reluctant spouse joins later, once counselling stops being an abstract threat and starts being a concrete thing their partner simply does.
We’re considering separation. Is counselling still for us?
We can’t promise an outcome — no honest therapist can. But if separation is genuinely on the table, counselling can help you make that decision deliberately rather than by erosion — and whatever you decide, to understand what happened well enough not to carry the same pattern forward.
Is marriage counselling right if there’s been violence or intimidation?
Not usually, and not as a first step. Where there’s violence, intimidation, or coercion, we’d start with individual support instead. If this is your situation, VictimLinkBC is free, confidential and available 24/7 — call or text 1-800-563-0808.
Marriage Counselling in Langley
We see couples at our Langley office — free on-site parking, easy access from Highway 1 — serving Walnut Grove, Brookswood, Murrayville, Surrey, Cloverdale, Aldergrove, and the wider Fraser Valley, in person and online across BC. Directions are on our location page.
Reaching out about your marriage takes courage — often it’s one partner going first. Contact us with your questions or book an appointment online; we respond within 1–2 business days.
Related Services at Vista
Marriage counselling sits within our wider couples counselling work at Vista — the same approaches, whether or not you’re legally married. And not every step has to be taken together: some people begin with individual counselling — especially when past trauma is part of what keeps surfacing in the marriage.